Thursday, October 27, 2011

Love in every step



I have a lot of quit in me,
Speaking from past endeavors as well as how I have felt recently
But I also have a lot of fight in me,
I want to know if I go down, it wasn’t because I didn’t put up a good fight.

And sometimes I HAVE to fight it out
Battle it out_ this faith of mine and the journey I’m on.
My family and I are at a different place in our lives, one I never anticipated
It’s uncharted territory for us
I’m frustrated
There are days when I feel alone
I’m disappointed
And at times I want to curl up and quit
And at others_ I want to swing_ spit_ and fight my way through

We are healthy
We have a roof over our heads
We have a job
We have 3 beautiful, healthy kids
We are extremely blessed and this is where my guilt starts to come_
I have absolutely no reason to feel funky_ to get the funk
But I do
Some days it’s just hard
Hard to get through
And I know it shouldn’t be
But the funk still comes
And so along comes the guilt that I feel

For me though, the questioning “why”_ “the wrestle” is a good thing
It’s where I am humbled
And I find out just how little I know
How very little control I have in all of this
But how much He loves and the fact
That He’ll never let go
I’m battling,
But I’m pressing on
I can’t afford to give up_ to give in
He (our all knowing heavenly Father) is the reason I can never quit

I'm thankful_ that He loves me every step of the way....
even when some steps take all the strength we can muster up.

.... for this too shall pass

Heather :)







12 comments:

  1. Beautiful as always! All things are possible through Christ who gives us strength! :) Even when our lives are crazy and different things of this world are bringing us down....the assurance of God's mercy and grace is what drags me out of my funk each and every day! :) Love your heart!

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  2. I'm very good friends with that "funk" as you put it. I love how God helps us through that funk and gives us the strength to press on! Lovely writing...

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  3. Heather it saddens me to know you are in a funk and whatever it may be, it will pass (like you said). It is admirable that despite all the things you have on your plate, you are continually counting your blessings! Love you!

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  4. I think so many of us can relate to the funk. I am sorry that your are finding yourself there, but I'm glad you shared. Praying that God raises you out of it today, sweet friend.

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  5. Amen, sista! What a great post. So relatable. I'm sorry you're in this rut, but it will end soon.

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  6. oh lovely. This spoke right to my heart. You are an amazing and sweet spirited lady and I am praying you get through this funk, I know all too well how it feels! <3

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  7. amen and amen, spoke to me alot too. love you friend. Bless you today!!

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  8. Amen! I was recently telling a friend that Ive NEVER been so tested and stretched in my life as Im being right now. Yet its good to know that God hasnt forgotten me. How do I know? Because He's testing me and these trials are meant to GROW me, not let me lose my way.
    Hang in there, friend.
    xo

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  9. Yes it will girl!
    "But You, O Lord, are a shield for me, my glory and the One who lifts up my head" psalm 3:3
    Such a wonderful truth! Praying for you... Us! ;)
    xxoo

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  10. Oh Heather! You know I feel you on this! So similar to what I am feeling in many aspects of my life right now...you put it so eloquently. Staying strong an praying for us ;)

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  11. i'm with you friend! thanks for this reminder. just this morning, i feel jesus turning my face to his, repeating "just fix your eyes on me." that is my prayer right now. that i'd keep my eyes on him and not get pulled into the tide of my emotions and fears...thanks for sharing.

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  12. I've been right there with you! You are definitely not alone! What helped me was the thousand gifts book and a sis in law that convinced me to go to the gym with her:) It's hard. I get it. Don't give up! Love ya!
    And I love that you are honest enough to share.

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