Thursday, May 26, 2011

A Beautiful Letdown

 In March Gabi turned 10 and all she wanted for her birthday was a pair of Toms__ blue glitter Toms. Only thing, when we went to order them they were all sold out. Like everywhere-none were to be found, even at the specialty stores. We had to explain this to her and see if another pair, maybe the pink glitters would do? Nope, she had her heart set on the blue glitter and she would wait until they made more and were back in stock.

Literally, from March until now Gabi has checked the Toms website everyday after getting home from school. With dissappointment each day she has come to me again & again letting me know "they're still not in". I even called the Tom's headquarters trying to see when they would have more in stock only to have them share with me "they would be in soon, real soon".

2 weeks ago Gabi came home to her normal routine of checking their website and spotted these new babes.
 She immediately went into the mode of "well what if I get these and then they get in the blue glitters." "I'm still going to want those too".
With a lot of thought put into the decision she decided to order the blue animal print with the intention that if the glitters came in she then would ask for them for Christmas.
 Once again, the ritual started__only now it was for her to find the package delivered and waiting for her on the front porch. Each night she would tell me before going to bed" I wonder if my Toms will come in tomorrow?" Or when dropping her off in the mornings at school "mom, do you think my Toms will be delivered today?" And every time the UPS truck made the rumbling coming up the street and passed our house I had to see her let down. The let down of not getting what she had so longed for since her birthday.

I could relate many times I can want something so much that I almost miss the point of waiting...miss the process in the waiting. I have found this time to be the most crucial time. Often times it's painful-there's chipping & molding on me taking place and it's not always a pretty little package. In these times I start to see...really see. Blinders are lifted, my perspective shifts, things are brought into the Light, and it's always good. Because He is good.

Her package did seem like it took forever to arrive. Finally, this Tuesday after coming home, finding the front porch empty, and having been defeated because all hope was given over to the thought that "they're just not coming, they're out of these too". "My Toms are never going to get here".......we hear the rumble.
When I tell you my house erupted -it did! The squeals and jumping from Gabi and Kayli were unstoppable. I think the UPS guy was a little bummed to find out it wasn't him they were so excited to see.
 They had arrived-they were finally here.
 I had no sooner closed the front door when Grayson, playing games at the computer, says "that's how God feels when someone gets saved". This statement stopped me in my tracks and was one of those moments when I want to cry.. because he gets it and the fact that he even just had that thought means that he's thinking on heavenly things, which to me means, he gets it!
 I started to think how do I respond to the waiting....Do I anticipate great things, am I excited to see what's next? Am I waiting with expectancy?

Every package I receive or Gabi, Kayli, or Grayson  receives is good. It may not always be the original blue glitter, but we still are able to have the blue animal print and in the end they were just as good.

All of that over a pair of Toms, but I wouldn't want it any other was a beautiful letdown.

Heather :)


  1. Aw...awesome to hear your son put things into heavenly perspective.
    I remember when the news erupted over Osama Bin Laden's death by US troops. On our Christian radio station a woman called in and said that her young daughter had asked her "mommy, do you think God forgave him before he died?" That hit me like a ton of bricks. Here everyone around me was cheering and hailing his death and yet this little girl had things in the right perspetive...she was concerned about his eternity. I was instantly humbled.